


Loves Me So, Loves Me Not

by karnsniehaus



Category: Carmilla (Web Series) RPF, Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-20 11:04:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16135916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/karnsniehaus/pseuds/karnsniehaus
Summary: Natasha and Elise have been friends for a long time, but Alex notices something between them that her sister refuses to see. Sleepover goes wrong. Or does it?The cliché friends-to-lovers AU."She doesn't like me... like that." Natasha felt the hiccups coming once again. "It was so humiliating.""Tell me what happened there, little girl." Chyler asked, rubbing her thumb on her sister's back, giving some comfort through physical contact.





	Loves Me So, Loves Me Not

**Author's Note:**

> If you're not comfortable with RPF, this may not be the oneshot for you. I wrote this a long time ago (almost a year now) and I tried to change it for their characters but there's a Carmilla reference that I couldn't change.  
> The scenario is set completely in a alternative universe, so it has nothing to do with the Supergirl/Carmilla universe.
> 
> This oneshot has NOTHING (like, ANYTHING) to do with their real lives and it's just for fun.

“Natasha, where are you going?”  
It was getting dark when Alex saw her younger sister getting out through the front door.

“To Elise’s. She invited me over for dinner. I might sleep over, too.”

“Ok, does her mother know?”

“Guess so. She must’ve told her.”

“Ok, if you need anything just text me, ok? Maggie is coming over but it won’t be a trouble if you need me.”

“Then I’ll make sure to not enter the house before 10AM. God knows what you will be doing.”

“Ok, get out.” Alex threw the kitchen towel in the air and giggled, as Natasha ran out to the next door where Elise lived.

 

Their relationship was the best it could be. Since they lost their parents to a car accident, Alex and Natasha got closer and now they only have each other. No grandmother, granfather or even aunts and uncles.

Alex didn’t always know she was gay. She found out – and accepted it as this is who she is – 5 years ago, when she was 20. It didn’t take Alex by surprise when she noticed some strange behavior coming from her sister when it was about Elise. The joy in her tone everytime she mentioned her name, the happiness in her eyes everytime she saw Elise just passing by. She was always hugging and touching her hand or her arm. Alex knew her sister felt something more for Elise for a long time now, but she didn’t say anything. It wasn’t up to her. It was up to Natasha. She knew Natasha would say something when she’s ready.

Thirty minutes after Natasha left, Alex heard the doorbell. When she opened the door, Maggie was standing there holding a bottle of wine and a box of sushi.

“You know me so well.” Alex leaned towards her and softly kissed her.

“I do, don’t I?” Maggie held Alex’s face and kissed her again. “How are you?”

“I’m fine, babe. You ok? You seem a little down.”

“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s just my back. It hurts like hell.”

“I told you Crossfit would kill you and that scoliosis of yours.”

“The doctor said it was fine!”

“You know... I could give you a massage.” Alex didn’t mean to sound dirty, but she didn’t regret it.

“Oh, I’d like that!” Maggie smiled suggestively at her as she put the food down on the table. “Where’s Natasha?”

“She’s at Elise’s.

“She’s hanging out a lot with her lately, don’t you think?”

Maggie grabbed a plate and put pieces of sushi on it, taking it to the couch as she spoke. Alex also grabbed two glasses and poured the wine in it. She put the glasses on the table and sat on the couch. Maggie held her against her body and Alex rested her head on her shoulder.

“Yeah, but it’s ok. Elise is a good girl. I didn’t want to say anything, but I think there’s something... _more..._ going on with them.”

“You think?

“Oh, come on, you’re a detective. Haven’t you noticed? You basically live here.”

“I have, but I didn’t want to say anything, it’s not up to me and I didn’t know how you feel about it.”

“Yeah, I think so too. They’re too touchy. More than you and me. Trust me, it’s possible. Especially Natasha. When they’re together, she just won’t let her go. They cuddle all the time.”

“She’s really your sister, damn.” Maggie put a piece of sushi in her mouth and gave one to Alex. “These are so good.”

“She is. And these are really good indeed.”

 

Maggie heard the door opening at 11PM and noticed they had fallen asleep while watching tv. She saw Natasha trying not to make noise, but she failed once she could hear her crying.

“Hey, Nat.” Maggie whispered, scaring Natasha. She waved back at her, forcing a smile. “What’s going on? Why are you all wet?”

She didn’t notice it was raining outside.

“It’s... It’s nothing. I’m going to my room.” she could barely speak.

“Hey, babe.” Maggie didn’t want to wake Alex up, but she knew her sister needed her. “Nat’s home and she’s crying. I don’t think she’s fine.”

“She is?” she woke up and took a look around. “Did we fall asleep? What time is it?”

“Eleven-ish. I think. Go, she’s in her room.”

Alex got up and went upstairs as fast as she could. When she opened Natasha’s bedroom door, she saw the girl lying with her face on her pillow and sobbing. You could see her body shaking.

“Hey, baby girl, what’s up?” Alex sat on her bed and caressed her hair. – What happened?

“I really don’t want to talk about it.”

“Hey, look at me.” she asked patiently. It took some time until Natasha got up and faced her sister. “What happened?”

“It’s silly.”

“You came home at 11PM, crying. It’s not silly.”

“I don’t know if I’m ready.” She said as crossed her legs and grabbed a pillow.

“I think I know what you’re trying to say.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, and it has something to do with Elise.”

“Yeah...”

“And your feelings.”

“I think you know, then.”

Natasha was trying so hard not to burst into more tears. She could feel her eyes burning and all she did was just throw herself back on her bed to, at least, avoid her ugly crying in front of her sister.

Alex knew she couldn’t do much, so she just sat there, carefully placing her hand on Natasha’s back as a comfort. They stayed in that position for about two minutes, when Natasha finally sat up and broke the silence:

“She doesn’t love me... _like that._ ” she sounded so hurt. Her sister just couldn’t leave her alone, so she hugged her. “It was so humiliating.”

“Tell me what happened there, little girl.” Alex’s voice was soft and you could feel sorrow in it. It was almost like she could feel the pain her sister was in.

“We were laying on her bed, just like we always do. We were watching something on Netflix and I honestly don’t even know what it was because I couldn’t pay attention to anything but her. At some point she started to stare at me and I couldn’t move, I wanted to stare back so bad but I couldn’t move my body. It was like I was frozen, my hands suddenly got cold and I almost started sweating. But then I turned my head to face her and kissed her. I don’t know how I managed to have the strenght to do that but I did. And it was so good.”

She was still crying, but she didn’t sound as hurt as she did before. It seemed like the talking was relieving some of the tension and the pain.

“But she dodged. She looked so scared and I thought _‘oh, my God, I really screwed it all up’_.”

“She didn’t say anything?”

“She tried to. I got up and walked towards the door to come home. She kept calling my name but I really couldn’t look at her.”

“It’s ok, baby girl.” Alex hugged her again as her sister started crying again. Natasha laid her head down on her sister’s lap and shrank up like a baby. “You’re fine. I’m here.”

“What am I gonna do?”

“You need to talk to her.”

“I can’t.” She didn’t even hesitate to answer. It was so sudden and she seemed scared just with the thought of talking to Elise again.

“Yes, you can. I know it’s hard, but if you don’t do it, it’ll leave things unsolved between you two and that’s the worse thing that can possibly happen.”

As soon as Alex finished the sentence, she heard a knock on the door.

“Come in, babe.” Alex responded and Natasha hesitantly looked at her. “It’s ok, baby, it’s just Maggie.”

“Hey, I’m so sorry, but Elise is at the front door. She’s asking to talk to you, Nat.” Maggie opened the door, enough for half of her body to fit. “I don’t know what happened between you two, but she’s standing in the porch, in the rain, waiting for you.”

Natasha looked once more at her sister. She knew she had to talk to Elise, her sister had just told her to. She wasn’t quite ready, but it was raining indeed and it was better to sort things out. She took a deep breath and answered:

“Let her in. Tell her to come up here.”

“I’m gonna leave you to it, ok? I’m gonna be downstairs if you need me.” Alex said as she kissed her sister’s forehead. Natasha knew she could lean on Alex and that, if anything went wrong, she would have her sister’s shoulder to cry on.

Alex stood up and walked towards the door, passing through Maggie and downstairs. You could hear her footsteps. Maggie entered the room and sat next to Natasha.

“Are you okay?”

“I will be.” She gave her a shy smile and Maggie smiled back.

“If you need anything, I’ll be with your sister. I’m here for you, ok? We’re gonna help you heal.”

“Thank you.” Natasha hugged Maggie, which she was not expecting, since Natasha isn’t the most physical person on the world. Maggie hugged her back and gave her a kiss on the forehead, just like her sister did a minute ago. “She’s coming. I’ll be downstairs.”

Maggie walked out and in the door gap Natasha could see Elise. She was soaked from head to toe. She was wearing the exact same clothes, didn’t even put a jacket on. Elise was wearing shorts and a t-shirt at 11PM, in the rain.

“Hey.” Elise said as she entered the room.

“Hey.” Natasha said as she looked at Elise. She didn’t know what she was feeling. It was a mix of happiness, sadness, anxiety and nervousness. Natasha was shaking, but she didn’t feel cold. She was so nervous she could throw up at any minute.

“Listen...”

“I’m sorry.” Natasha interrupted. “I’m so sorry. It won’t happen again.”

“You need to listen to me.” Elise sat next to her and looked straight in Natasha’s eyes. The girl could feel her gaze and a shock ran in her spine.

“I know you don’t like me like that. I understand that. I’m just so stupid.” Natasha hated to show weakness, but specially in front of Elise. She hated crying in front of her.

“Natasha, stop!” Elise grabbed her arm so Natasha could stop talking. She dried out the tears coming down on her face. “Listen to me. Don’t say anything, just listen. Ok?”

“Ok.”

“I didn’t mean to react like that. It was just the moment, I... I didn’t know you were going to kiss me. I didn’t even know you liked me like that.”

“Neither did I!”

“Natasha! No talking, remember?”

“Yeah, ok.”

“So... When you kissed me, I was in shock because I didn’t think you could like me the way I like you.”

“You what...?”

“Yeah, Natasha, I like you. Ok? I love you. Oh, my God, ok, it just came out... Oh, boy... I love you, ok? That’s it. I said it. And I’ve been trying so hard not to say anything, not to feel anything and Jake is a great person, and he really likes me but I know it’s not gonna work because I love _you._ ”

Now it was Elise who was crying. She tried so hard not to, but she just burst into tears. Natasha looked at her and she wanted to kiss her and hug her so bad, but once again, she couldn’t move. She wanted to hug her and comfort her saying that it’s all gonna be ok, but her stupid body wouldn’t respond the way she wanted it to.

“Elise...”

“You’re in me, in my head, all the time, it’s like you’re a disease or something, because I can’t sleep, I can’t do anything without thinking of you and I love you so much it... it actually hurts.”

“Elise.”

“It hurts because I couldn’t say anything afraid you would reject me but now there it is. It’s out. I said it. I love you. Oh, god, this feels so good. I love you.”

“Elise!” Natasha managed to smile even though tears were still coming down and Elise stopped talking. She stared at her. Elise’s eyes were red due to all the crying and she smiled back. “Now it’s your turn to stop talking.”

Natasha grabbed Elise’s face with both of her hands and kissed her gently. She was so nervous she thought anyone could hear her heartbeat from miles. Her whole body received an electric current when their tongues touched. Their lips intertwined so perfectly it was almost like the missing piece of a 1000-pieces-puzzle. When they stopped, they rested their foreheads on each other in silence. They didn’t need to say anything, the silence was comforting enough.

“So you’re saying you love me?” Natasha couldn’t believe what was happening. She felt like her heart was gonna jump out of her body.

“Yes, you silly.”

Natasha’s smile couldn’t be bigger. Elise’s heart was racing so fast. She was so happy. Natasha was so happy. All they needed was each other.

“I love you, too.”

And there it was another passionate, calm kiss. By that time, both of them were more calm than before. They were comfortable with each other’s presence again.

“You need to change.” Natasha broke the silence again, pointing to Elise’s wet clothes.

“It’s fine, I’m just gonna go home.”

“No, you’re not! The world is ending out there, I’m not letting you go. You’re gonna catch a cold.”

“I’m a vampire, I don’t get colds.” She joked.

“I already told you to stop reading Carmilla, it’s affecting that brain of yours. And plus, I’m Carmilla, you’re Laura. We’ve discussed this.” Natasha had that joke tone on her voice as she stood up and walked towards her closet.

“Why do I have to be Laura? That’s just rude.”

“I don’t know, you just are.” Natasha said as she took a pair of dry pijamas from her drawer. “Go take a shower and put these on, you’re sleeping over. I’m gonna text your mom and let her know.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, go. I’ll be right here when you finish.”

“Ok.” Elise took a last look at Natasha before going to the bathroom. Natasha smiled at her as she watched Elise disappear behind the closing door.

She ran downstairs and saw her sister and Maggie cuddling on the couch, watching some shitty tv reality show. They seemed to hear her coming down and both of them looked at her.

“It’s fine. She loves me.” she giggled, as she couldn’t believe it yet. “Yeah, she said she loves me. Like, three times. Or four. I don’t know, I wasn’t counting. And we kissed, like, twice. Oh, my God, I kissed her twice. She’s sleeping over. With my pijamas. Oh, my God. I’m freaking out. I’m not supposed to freak out, right?”

“Natasha, calm down!” Alex tried not to laugh, but she just couldn’t. She sat up and walked towards her sister and hugged her. “I’m so happy for you.”

“And me too.” Maggie hugged them both. “I knew you were gonna work things out. I’m so happy you’re happy. Love you, buddy.”

“Love you, too. Both of you. Thank you.” she smiled at them. “She’s taking a shower. I told her to because otherwise she was gonna get a cold, but then she said she’s a vampire and vampires don’t get colds.” she giggled again. “She’s adorable.”

“She needs to stop reading Carmilla.”

“I told her the exact same thing!”

“And she’s obviously Laura. Come on.” Alex rolled up her eyes, which made Maggie surprised.

“You read Sheridan Le Fanu’s books? I’m surprised.”

“Oh, come on. You’re a badass, leather kind of girl. And a lesbian. Who do you think invented this? Carmilla. She’s responsible.”

“Back in 1698 they didn’t wear leather clothes, Alex. They wore corsets.”

“That’s how I picture her, would you excuse me and my imagination? And why do you think I like it so much when you wear corsets, huh?”

“Guys!” Natasha yelled. “I don’t need to hear this. I’m going up because Elise is showering in my shower and she’s getting out pretty soon and I told her I’d be there when she was finished. So, if you’ll excuse me...”

“Go get the girl.” Maggie said, followed by a nod from her sister and a smile from both of them.

“And tell her she’s not Carmilla!” Alex yelled to Natasha as she reached the middle of the stairs.

“Leave them alone!”

 Natasha heard Maggie saying to her sister and laughed. They were such a cute couple. She hoped she and Elise would be like that someday. She knew that destiny wasn’t something you just make your own. Whatever happens, happens. If they’re meant to be together, they’ll find their way to each other. What really mattered to Natasha was the present. She knew what she wanted and it was Elise. She wanted to love her with every inch of her body and being, cause she loved her and she didn’t need anything else.


End file.
